There are infinite acts of compassion in this world. Some are well advertised, like "feeding the hungry" or "helping the sick."

Yet there are many others that are not that well advertised. I'm recognizing these other acts as I get older and have the time to stop and look back at my own life and see which acts led to what and what total good came out of it as a result.

One curious act that I could not commit in the past is actually no act at all. It is just plain "doing nothing." I've read somewhere that French philosopher Rene Pascal (not that I'm an expert on him) said "most evil in this world happens because a man cannot sit quietly by himself in a room and do nothing." What a compassionate observation

We are such busy bodies in perpetual motion that we feel we have to "do good" all the time, even though having someone else "imposing his goodness" on us might be the last thing we need in certain moments.

Think about the grief of a person who has lost a dearly loved family member. Think about people whose insides are aching with sorrow. Would it be an act of compassion to share a "funny joke" with such persons? Or invite them to a holiday cruise or a garden party? Of course not.

Or think about a person who has not trusted anyone for the last 40 years due to a terrible childhood trauma. What's the point of trying to get her attention and lecture her about her own "self worth"? If anything, such "compassionate talk" will only make her more nervous and will cause her to withdraw even further into her shell.

Leaving such people alone and resisting our do-gooder impulses is the most compassionate thing we can do in such circumstances. "Doing good" sometimes aims at getting credit for our own "superior conduct" and getting recognized for our own leadership skills. In those moment we must find the courage to just walk away.

When "doing good" is a selfish ego trip, the most compassionate thing we can do is just not do anything.